Don't be mad,

Because four hours

is a long time

for anybody to

have something

hot

pressed against their ear.

Only to realize that

This is the

somethingth time

I have made this mistake.

That's why.

That's why,
When it finally snowed

in Columbus,

I took the time,

because I forgot

how much

you hated not having

sand

in your bed.

And

When both of our feet

suspended themselves . . .

 

We were

optimistic,

like

helium balloons.

We were
Young.

And we thought it would be a good idea.

Now that you're happy though,

Now that you're happy again,
I should say.

Now that your lips pull
back into that

sweet, wet
smile that isn't mine
anymore

(Not that I can't make

you laugh,

just

not the way he can).

Because that was my idea,
too.
I knew

it was Inevitable.

That's why.

That's why
I was drunk
that time I kicked
you out of bed.

"I'm sorry -"
I had said.

was all I had to say for myself.

And you were so upset,
And that glass you gave me

Is still in my freezer.

"I love you,"

It says.

"Happy Birthday."

At my sisters wedding,

you slapped me

(I was drunk then too),

And when you

stormed off,
I closed my eyes

And
Felt the
The whole world
Spinning past me,
A carousel.

And all I ever

wanted was for

the world to

stop spinning,

So that I could

catch you.

Although

I never did.

And I thought about
you with my eyes closed,

And often still do.

I found you

later on

in a dry bath tub

with your arms folded.

It took so long

for me to dry out.

"I'm sorry -"

I had said.

was all I had to say for myself.